A whole new world of job hunting

I've been reading a lot of job listings for bartender positions lately. Let me tell you, it is a lot more fun than reading office job listings!

Here are excerpts from posts that made me smile:

"The perfect candidate must possess a bubbly, energetic, outgoing, vivacious, assertive personality."

Doesn't that sound great? These next two read like poems:

"Female Bartender
- Must be female
- Attractive, in and out
- Honest, high work integrity
- Must be able to work weekends
- Valid work authorization "


"New Trendy Lower East Side Bar and Restaurant
Opening Soon.
Looking for that “Downtown Vibe”

'Downtown Vibe' is my gangsta name.


"Looking for some female Bartenders WITH A FOLLOWING, for day or night shifts in a nice friendly neighborhood Bar in Massapequa.
ALL AGES can apply. Crowd is friendly and mature...... no jerks, no worries."

'No Jerks, No Worries' would be a great bar name! (For my Midwestern readers: Massapequa is a town on Long Island.)


"You must:
have prior experience, excellent personality and manners, micros experience
Follow these simple directions:
PASTE your resume onto the body of the email and attach some pics. "

It is pretty standard for the ad to ask for pictures, and they often say, "No photo, no response."

What I love about all these listings is that they're concise and direct. There's no politically correct phraseology or HR stiffness. And a great personality is worth more than a college degree, just like in real life ;)

So far I have not found a job as a bartender, but I am really enjoying looking for one! I think I'd better go practice my pour...